19.3.09

how it goes

Max was thankful when his mother left.

It was all a mess. More of a mess than before.

"I hope you're happy." Max just looked at Bex.

"Of course, I'm not happy." Bex frowned as she went to her bedroom. "There is just so much I don't know." She sat down on her bed as if she could crash from all the excitement of dinner.

"Well, life is a mystery." Max sighed.

"Yeah, but why does it mean just more questions." She frowned. "You can't be straight with me about, you know-."

"Bex, I don't want to talk about me. You don't have to worry about me, you know." Max almost laughed.

"But- but your my brother and you're suppose to tell me everything. And you didn't." She sighed.

"I just want to keep being your brother, that's all." He put his hand on her shoulder then.

"Well, of course, you'll always be my brother," Bex looked at him. "But why couldn't you have told me you were gay. Why did I have to find out, you know...how..." She made a bitter face then.

"I dunno." Max shook his head. "I just don't feel the need to say it. All right. Is that enough. I mean, I just don't know what you want to hear. Its just there and well, you just get on with life, and if you're lucky enough to fall in love then that's what is really important. Love. All right. And the love I have for you, hasn't changed. I just didn't want things for us change."

"All right," she sighed heavily. "I'm sorry. I wish Mom could just-"

"She means well. I think. I used to, anyhow, believe that. Now its as if she's built up these walls that nobody can get through. But she loves us. She loves you. Maybe even Oliver, too. "

"God, I can't believe she'd say that about Oliver and everything." Bex looked away.

"Did you two ever discuss wanting Chloe?" Bex wondered.

"No, he never said anything to me. I think Oliver is fine with you two. And he's an uncle. He's still Chloe's uncle."

"Yeah, he's Chloe's uncle," Max smiled. "And you're an Aunt."

"Yeah, some day I'm sure she'll be telling stories about her crazy old Aunt." Bex smiled and Max put his arm around Bex as if things were going to be better.

4 comments:

ellie said...

I'm glad Max and Bex talked but still I'm not sure it was exactly the talk Bex wanted.

Cate said...

Poor Max.
Bex... Of course, Max would need to come out sooner or later, also to his family, but after all he's an adult and if he doesn't want to, he doesn't need to.
The ending seems pretty peaceful though.

just a moment said...

Hopefully, there won't be anymore of those kind of dinners.

ivy's closet said...

so bitter sweet. I feel they really have to be there for each other.