8.4.09

outside looking in

Nancy wished Geoff really...well, wanted her. It wasn't that long ago that guys did. They did. She wasn't sure where it went wrong. Actually. After all, she was pretty enough. She guessed. Maybe it was because she didn't have real friends back in high school like she thought she did. Maybe it was the fact she wanted too much. It was as if she wanted a nice house and everything just handed to her, but instead, all she had was a huge debt to pay. Now a baby who lodged itself just so in her belly that she swore the foot was pushing the underside of her right boob.... and it felt like it was the end of everything.

Dayton was sort of her last chance. Maybe it felt great to be with not only her best friend's ex, but Bex was her rival too. And she had something of hers, at least for a little while.

She hadn't meant for it turn out that way, but she'd always felt herself competing with Bex who hadn't even noticed, evidently. It was just hard to get noticed sometimes, and now she was paying the price as she walked alone through the mega grocery store. She stopped to look at cheap movies. She couldn't even buy those. She was strapped for cash. If she ever got out of this situation, she was going to Paris. Honestly, she thought she deserved to go. Perhaps something fantastic would happen there. She'd actually fall in love and find her real purpose in life. People kept talking about your purpose in life all the time on Oprah. And Nancy wanted one of those, she did. She wondered what she'd have to pay to get one.

Nancy looked up then and saw Geoff. Dayton was with him. Nancy scowled instantly. Her luck he was just here to tell her how fat she was. She hugged herself then.

"What's he doing here?" Nancy gave Dayton an evil stare.

"I forgot to mention," Geoff started then paused. "Dayton is with me now."

She just squinted hard. It felt as if wasn't just opposites day, but perhaps bass-ackwards day. She had nothing to say to him. This was useless. Why couldn't she rewind and be home in bed. Alone.

"I should have known." She barely said. Why did she have to talk now?

"I didn't want to keep it from you," Geoff said. "I mean, you might not want me to, you know, help you."

She fought back the tears, slipping up in her eyes. She stared at both of them. "What do you want me to say? I'm happy. It couldn't get any better." She wanted to scream so loud, but she didn't. She just felt so bitter. So angry. She didn't know what else to do as she spun out, away from them. Everything was so dizzy and then it faded to black.

3 comments:

em said...

Can't wait to read it:) And yeah I'm just experimenting

ellie said...

Wow..of all things to happen in the grocery store.

simon n josh said...

shocker!